Someday a girl is gonna give you a flower. You got that? A flower. And you have to help her Nick.
zeus….. IS the father
*hera throws chair and has to be restrained by security titans*
That’s it. That’s Greek mythology.
I AM NOT FUCKING OK RIGHT NOW! YOU KNOW WHAT I’M THINKING THIS IS? This is just NOT ok…Wasn’t #The Winter Soldier bad enough? I mean come on Marvel…our hearts are so beyond broken.
i understood that reference
For my ragtag friends on twitter who are always up to shenanigans. (Also needed this out of my head.)
Would you rather have Tony Stark’s mustache or Thor’s abs?
Welcome one and all to the Brodown. A competition that pits Russian Spy against Russian Spy against … dude with awesome wings, I forget what his military position is … in the quest to become CAPTAIN AMERICA’S BEST BRO.
The challengers are:
Natasha Romanoff a.k.a. Black Widow a.k.a A Crap Ton of other Aliases
Strengths: Sass. Girl Power. Probs reminds him of Peggy and shit. Could fucking kill her competitors in four seconds if we allowed that sort of thing.
History in Competition: Once stole the SATs together.
Special Skills: Finding a hair straightener literally anywhere.
Strategy: Get Steve laid.
Sam Wilson a.k.a. Falcon
Strengths: Will do anything Cap says. No, like, anything. Like at all.
Weaknesses: Will do anything Cap says. No, like, anything. Like at all.
History in Competition: Steve was on his left.
Special Skills: Owns a hair straightener even though his hair’s really short so you know he got game.
Strategy: Bond over losing a bro in war.
James Buchanan “Bucky” Barnes a.k.a. The Winter Soldier
Strengths: Was the Bro Steve lost in war — take that! Really pretty eyes.
Weaknesses: Really bad at eyeliner. Wants to kill Captain America
History in Competition: Returning Champion (Runner up: Howard Stark … there wasn’t much of a fight)
Special Skills: Sometimes he remembers his own name and stuff.